My Papa

Papa and Isaac a few weeks ago when we went for our visit. Papa was telling him he wanted to play basketball with him someday.


Papa died tonight. Mom called and said about 10:25. I was relieved. For a few minutes. And then the waterworks. I started thinking about the way he always looked at me when I walked in the door and when I was on my way out. It was the sparkle in his eyes. If a person could love another the way Jesus loves us, that would be how Papa made me feel. Everytime. And when he said, "I love you, peanut" I knew he really meant it. And that always felt really good.

I keep thinking about him being restored, now, in heaven. No more breathing treatments, no more pills, no more sleepless nights. He can mow the lawn, he can shovel the snow, he can go on trips in his motorhome again. He can collect more milk jugs, organize the carriage house and get around to fixing up his antique car (at least antique to me). And that makes me feel good.

A good friend of mine has a Puritan Proverb on her blog that reads, "Life has become a little less sweet, death a little less bitter."

Well said.

Isaac Update

Yesterday we went for our WIC appointment and the dietitian seemed quite displeased with Isaac's progress. She was very concerned with his weight and overall growth and asked a lot of questions about what he is and isn't eating. At first I was defensive (and if you know me, obviously so), but I had to give her credit, she was asking all the right questions and seemed very knowledgeable. So, I left feeling like a terrible mom. I already had an appointment scheduled for the pediatrician's office today, so I added the dietitians concerns to the growing list in my notebook.

I went to the Y today for the first official time since last July. I dropped the kiddos off at KidZone (1.5 hours of free daycare at the Y) and did 30 minutes cardio, talked with a good friend and took a shower. It was a fabulous start to the day! Off to the peds we went. Isaac measured 24 inches long and weighed 13 pounds 2 ounces. Her response to my concerns?! "Given where Isaac started, with all the complications he faced, in my opinion, Isaac is doing stellar." Ok. Well, now what? I shared the concerns of others he'd seen within the last month and she just didn't feel worried about his development. She said he could be getting more calories and made a few suggestions, but that was it. She's pleased with his growth and his skills. I'll go back in another month to get a weight check. In the end, no referral to the specialty clinic. And it's hard, ya know, because I agree with her. According to what other 5 month olds are doing, he's right on target except for rolling over and she's not concerned with that, yet. And, even if we did get a referral, they wouldn't diagnose him for at least a year, if not longer. And if they did, it could be a premature diagnosis and I don't want that. Jason's response? He said I go to the appointments and meet the docs. Who do I trust? Good question. I think I'm going to go with his pediatrician and hang in there until there's something more solid that points to a deficiency beyond prematurity.

But it's not easy.

Yea for Us!!

After we checked into the hotel in Canton, we made a visit to Aultman Hospital where Isaac was born and where we met him for the first time when he was a week old. Linda, the nurse pictured here, was Isaac's nurse the first night I met him. During his stay at Aultman, I was always thrilled when Linda had him. She was always kind and sensitive. Linda will always hold a special place in my heart.


On Saturday, we had a wonderful lunch with Chip and Sharon and their family. Chip and Sharon graciously offered to let us stay with them for several weeks before Isaac was tranferred to Rainbow Babies. They are such wonderful people. We had a great time with them and were so thankful to have met them. We look forward to keeping in touch with them over the years.


On Saturday afternoon we went to visit our friends we met at the Ronald McDonald House, Ken & Jeannie. Their son, Grady, was born two months early and had a heart transplant before his due date. Both boys are doing well and it was great to see our friends again. We're hoping to make it to their house again this summer.


On Monday we made our way north to Akron for Isaac's finalization hearing. This is us waiting outside the courtroom.


This is our family pic inside the courtroom after we were finished. We love you, Isaac!

Isaac's finalization is complete and he in now legally our son! It's a great feeling to be finished with the process. I feel like a bigger weight has been lifted than I did with Hannah. Not sure why.

We had a wonderful time in Ohio catching up with old friends. I didn't get a pic of our friends at the McKinley Grand Hotel (big mistake) but we had a great time there, too. It was nice to see everyone and for everyone to see Isaac (all for the first time). I would love to make a trip to Ohio every year. Hopefully, we can make that happen. Next time, we'll have to stop by Cleveland, too.

On another note, Papa remains in the hospital. Along with his heart and lung problems, he now has pneumonia. Gram continues to visit him everyday. We continue to pray for God's will in Papa's life. Loads of love to my Gram and Papa.

And one more thing....within the last two weeks, Isaac has started playing with his toes and blowing bubbles. Two big things for our little buddy, buddy. He'll be seeing his pediatrician this week and hopefully we'll get that referral I've been wanting....

Many blessings to everyone.

The kids and I were able to go to Grand Blanc last Monday-Wednesday. We had a nice time and know my mom and grandparents enjoyed seeing the kiddos.

Papa has since returned to the hospital. At this point, his life is in God's hands (I mean, it always is...but you know what I mean). The medical staff is doing everything they can to diagnose problems and keep him comfortable. Friends and family are praying and checking in. I want Papa to keep fighting, but I also want him to be comfortable. I continue to pray for God's will. I pray for strength for Gram. I couldn't love my grandparents ANY more. I simply adore them. I don't like to see them hurting. I can't do anything. So I pray.

Isaac had a visit with the opthalmologist (I know it's spelled wrong) today and we got some sobering news. While his eyes are doing well, the doctor is concerned with his neurological development. He saw some abnormalities and is suggesting an MRI for more information. We were aware in July, when we began this journey, that this would happen, but you're never prepared to hear that there's REALLY something potentially wrong. So, we'll be seeing his pediatrician next week for a (hopefully) referral to a specialty clinic at DeVos Children's here in GR, for a complete work-up. His PT and I have also been seeing signs of slower than "normal" fine/gross motor skill development. We will again, pray for God's will and hope for the best.

Within days, we'll be headed to Ohio for Isaac's finalization. Soon, Isaac will legally be our son. Of course, he's been our son in our hearts since the moment we heard we were his family. It's been quite a journey. Thank you for all you've done to make it what it's been. And it's been wonderful.

Jason and I are working dilligently to make UJE a bigger reality. We've started to put together a Board of Directors and are filling out all the paperwork to apply for 501(c)(3)status. Please, visit the UJE website to read more about what we're doing and how we could use your help. We have also started a $10/month club where you can commit to sending $10/month for 12 months. This money is strictly used to guy gift cards and stamps to include in care packages. Again, you can read more in the UJE posts.

Always love to hear from you.


Much love.